Pokemon No-Go: Moscow GPS foils taxis, Uber, runners

We love this story, but of course are not amused about those actually getting lost. It's truly an "only in Russia thing":

Russians seek answers to central Moscow GPS anomaly

From the marathoners who magically run at a higher rate to Uber drivers thrown 30 kilometres off-course, Putin's GPS shield is bringing cloaking devices into modern un-reality.

"Isn't this the Kremlin?"
"No, you idiot, it's Vnukovo Airport!"
"Where's Pikachu then?"
"How the hell am I supposed to know?"
"It was your turn to handle directions!"
"I followed them!"
"Then where the hell is the Kremlin?"
"It's supposed to be right here!"
"Then why does the GPS on my phone keep telling me this is the airport?"
"Where are the planes?"
"I don't know!"
"It doesn't look like any airport I've ever seen..."
"They probably stopped air traffic because Putin is arriving."
"That's stupid."
"No, it's not."
"Helicopter."

"Pikachu's in a helicopter?!?"
"No, you idiot, it's Putin's helicopter!! Can't you hear it?"
"Yes, but..."
"Look, there it is! It IS Putin!"
"Holy shit."
"No shit! I told you!"
"Then where's [inaudible]?"
"What...?!?"
"I said, where [inaudible] then?"
"I can't hear you!!!"
"No shit chickenshit".
"Wow, that thing's loud..."
"Did you see Putin waving?"
"No, of course not!"
"I swear I saw him!"
"Can't be."
"Why's that?"
"Because it's his double, you idiot!!!"
"His what?!?!"
"You think they'd let Putin wave?! It's his DOUBLE, dufus!"
"He has a double?"
"Of couse he does, numbskull."
"Oh."
"I wonder when the planes will start again."

"So where's Pikachu then?"
"Cloaked."
"What?!?"
"Cloaked. You know, stealth technology."
"You think Pikachu has a cloaking device?!?"
"Sure, why not?"
"You watch too much Star Trek!"
"No I don't!"
"So where's Pikachu then?"
"I don't know!"
"Why don't you ask William Shatner then?!?"
"Kirk?!? Where? What...?"
"I just keep feeling like he's going to magically turn up..."
"Ha. True."
"I'm ready for vodka."
"Me too."
"Maybe Pikachu is in the bar."
"With Shatner".
"Ha. No shit."
"Well, let's go then."
"Keep your eyes open for him."
"Who? Pikachu? Or Shatner?"
"Ha. Do you hear planes?"
"Huh?"
"It's an airport, remember?"
"No, it's the Kremlin."
"Oh, geez... Let's get that vodka..."
"Roger that!"